arnsdorf fw11

Just got back from a show for L'Oreal Melbourne Fashion Week (sounds like I modelled in it...pssht, I did) and this was the one for the up and coming designers who had managed to (through bribery) claw their way through to the final runway show (reminiscent of Project Runway). All we needed was an awkward and highly innept celebrity guest judge to be there (Nicky Hilton anyone?) and Heidi Klum to utter the words "Auf Wierdersehen" to get the ball rolling.

Among the fresh young faces, there were labels such as Arnsdorf, Bassike, From Britten, Dressup, Ellery, Laurence Pasquier, Lui Hon and the winner: song for the mute. Now Dion Lee previously won this title and look at him now, so naturally, we'll be sure to be hearing from song for the mute pretty soon in the near future. I don't think they'll be doing a reality tv winner on us (where they promise you they'll be famous one day but you see them 5 years down the track serving you a thick shake and fries at Wendy's).

Lui Hon FW11

Song for the mute

To be honest, song for the mute was awesome, and don't get me wrong, who doesn't love a harem pant on a male model, but I was more interested in staring at the models and thinking what sick things I could do to them. No, I'm only kidding. But seriously, can anyone tell me the model who opened the show for Bassike? I want to facebook stalk him.

Moving on, arnsdorf really was the stand out of the show. Here's a taste of the fw11 collection, which will soon off the rack and on my bodeh.

I love how they've panelled the blue with the sandy-salmon shirt. I'm getting on that shit as soon as it comes into Green with Envy or Grace (and no, they do not ask me to plug them this much - I'm just that obsessed with those stores). I would baptize my baby in that store if I was allowed. 

There was one thing I hated about arnsdorf's show, and that was the horrideous (that's not a word, but I'm asian so who cares) shoes. I think they were Doc Martin's but they looked like they belonged in my school uniform wardrobe (circa 1999). I wasn't a fan. It just distracted me from the clothes. 

But, what I did love was this model who walked for all the designers and she was just larrrrving the attensh (in a good way). She made everyone in the room smile and talk about her because she was just so enthusiatic.

Laurence Pasquier FW11

So naturally, I went home and stalked the shit out of her, and low and behold, I can't find her. Someone help!! But yes, my predictions are that she'll be the next Liu Wen. Watch out for her, she will be huge! (No, not fat)

rag & boner

fw 11/12

this is a rant

I've been meaning to do this for a while now, and stemming from my Zara post, it has given me more motivation and inspiration for this bad boy. I will now go on a 20 minute rant as to what I hate about fashion in Australia. Well, technically, it can't really be called fashion, it's just what people like to wear on a daily basis, and it just so happens to smack me in the face as I go outside every, single, day.

1. Ugg Boots
No Australia, you should not have a stand alone store dedicated to Ugg Boots, much less a whole historical building dedicated to these heinous creations. Sure they keep my toes nice and warm, but seeing them outside on a 30 degree day (Celsius) with a pair of short denim shorts to accompany them irks me. It doesn't make sense. Are you hot or are you cold?! Please do us all a favour and watch the weather forecast that day so we do not have to suffer from looking at the exposed skin that is between the top of your ugg boots and the bottom of your inappropriately short denim shorts.


Tucking your track suit pants into your ugg boots, does not (and I repeat), does not help either, nor will it increase your chances of getting a boyfriend.

2. Long socks & Canvas shoes 
No. Just don't. Please, for the love of God, do not wear these shoes over socks that stretch up to your calves. The next tweenager I see wearing this look will get slapped in the face with a fish. I will literally eat your family, then eat your pets.

3. Supre singlets 
Please, for the love of Jesus, do not ever go outside and wear a Supre singlet with a quote attached to it. What do those people think when they look at themselves in the mirror with their "I heart my boyfriend" singlet on? Do you think it's funny? Is it witty? Does it actually make you look like an intelligent girl that can hold her own? No! So take the damn thing off before I throw you off my balcony.

Are you legitimately serious?

4. Country Road shoulder bags 
Look, I have a few. Kudos. They actually do make a good overnight bag but if I see one more Country Road bag (or a copy of it - Sportsgirl, I'm talking to you) waltzing around the street in the day time and being used as a hand bag, I will literally grab my dads samurai sword and slash the shit out of it. It's made of canvas, hence it will slash. I am not even remotely joking.

What the hell

So everyone, that was my rant 1.0. I'm sure there will be many more coming your way but I needed to get that off my chest. It was only a matter of time before I stopped being polite but don't worry, nice Jessie will come back next post.

Until then, Australian tweenagers beware, I have a newly sharpened sword with your Country Road bag's name on it. You were warned.

To everyone else, happy labour day!

zara is coming down south

zara march 11

You heard me, Aussies. Get your kangaroo out and hop down to your nearest Zara store this coming winter. We always get hit with the shit stick, but looks like Zara is finally making its way down to Australia and it is being labelled the "Country Road Killer." What a pity.

I, quite frankly, am growing tired of Australia's never-say-die trends (this deserves a new post). Hopefully Zara will come in and kill off all of these and actually give us some decent ideas as to what the rest of the civilisation is wearing. Love the colour blocking bee tee double you (btw = by the way). Show Australia how to do it right Zara. I will leave you and go write up another post, get ready for my rant of the century.

maybe I can be a good person after all

Sometimes I think to myself, I should just drop out of school and stay at home thinking of really cool and inspirational quotes for people to use. How long do you think these people took to make up these quotes? It's funny if you think about it - imagine Andy Warhol brainstorming and perfecting every single quote of his. They're pure gold they are, but tell me this Andy, how long did it take you, hmm? I bet you're pretty chuffed with your efforts.

And you, miss Kate Moss, you have caused quite a bit of kerfuffle (love that word - it has 3 f's) with some of the zingers that have come out of your mouth. 

"Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels." Wow, if that's not going to piss of a few people, I don't know what is. Regardless, she puts the 'ph' in phat and I'll always be a fan.   

"...it's easy to be chewed up and spat out. You've got to stay ahead of the game to be able to stay in it."

euphoria

On a totally unrelated note to anything fashion, I met a hero of mine today but I'm pretty sure I traumatised her with my squealing. I said to myself at the start of this whole thing, "cool your jets, don't make a fool out of yourself (like you did at the Britney Spears and Taylor Swift concerts)." 

You see, this concerning attachment I have with celebrities (whether A-list or downright Australian Z-list, and that's saying something), has been growing exponentially larger as I get older. It was evident when I saw the look on Nigella's face as I asked her out to dinner with me today. I'm pretty sure if I told her that I facebook stalk her children regularly, that would have been the tip of the iceberg and the Po Po would have been in there like no one's business (Po Po = Police, thanks to Ke$ha...or should I say Keh, dollar sign, ha). Budda bump ching.


Here are some photos from my adventure today. Enjoy!

ring: ysl. bracelet: sass&bide

t-shirt: acne. watch: michael kors. oven mit: bed, bath & beyond

she thinks I'm a freak 

Yes, I am wearing an oven mit okay. How else was I going to get Nigella's attention? I'm kind of cringing as I'm writing this post, as I'm thinking back to what I said to her today. You know when you have so much adrenaline running through your body, your hands start shaking, your voice starts stammering and you develop a nervous laughter circa Peter from Family Guy? Well, take that and multiply that by two girls trying to get in as many words as possible into a 15 second time frame whilst getting our books signed. Do you think it would have been too much if I asked her to sign my boob?

It was like word vomit coming out of my mouth. I don't even remember what I said but I'm pretty sure I nervously laughed after asking every single question, then proceeded to ignore her question whilst racking off a few more questions and unfunny jokes. All whilst wearing that red oven mit. 

I'm not proud of what I did today, but look, I got to meet my idol (and most importantly, hug her - although it was more like an awkward jiggle topped off with a tap on the head) and that's what's important to me.

Moral of the story: don't do drugs. Don't tell celebrities you want to have their babies.
Adios!

mario testino

I was flipping through the newspaper the other day. That is a complete lie in an attempt to sound intellectual. Anyway I was flipping through perezhilton.com, sorry I meant the Encyclopedia, when I stumbled across this cheese ball photo of Prince William and his soon-to-be-royal-wifey, Kate Middleton.

Definition of cheese

To my astonishment, I found out that this nice little family portrait was shot by none other than the Mario Testino. Hit the breaks. Yes, that's the one. The one that shoots Kate Moss. The one that is BFF's with Anna Wintour (oh whoops, I thought I was talking about me). The one that has released a million coffee table fashion photography books. The one who introduced me to Kate Moss. Yes, that's "the one." 

Kate Moss. I don't know where to begin. First of all, can I just say how hard it is to write a serious blog when you have Prince William and Kate Middleton smiling at you like the world is about to end and they're about to eat your family.

I don't know what it is about Kate Moss, but she is up there with my number one idols (those of which include Nigella Lawson and Britney Spears). Her partnership with Mario Testino brought me so much joy - I just wanted to share a few shots with you.

And without further....ado (is that how you spell it?), I give you my all time personal favourite (has been my computer and phone background for 2 years):

"What people say isn't going to stop me. I have to do things for myself."

Don't ask why. Just sit there and bask in the glory that is Kate Moss. Mario Testino, you are a genius. Do you have any sons my age? I swear to God, I will respect him and not use him for his father's photograph collection. 

Good night everyone!

ex oh ex oh.